Jul 12, 2016 01:56 PM EDT

Dallas Shooting, Police Chief David Brown: Difficult Career Ahead After Five Officers Dead

By Jane Reed

He hoped to find a "quiet place and get my head around" what was happening or what was about to happen. The Dallas Police Chief David Brown recently sat down with reporters and told them that it is the most challenging time in his career. "It's going to be the most challenging thing in my life, to be quite honest with you," he told reporters. "I don't know how I'm going to get through the week."

For three days, Dallas Police Chief David Brown had given the country updates on a shocking ambush that killed five city officers. It was an emotional point in his career and he is now preparing for their funerals.

Emotional over the loss, he quietly prays during the Thanks Giving square vigil. But according to reports, he is experiencing inner turmoil. He was never fond of the spotlight but when several of his men was shot, he was forced to express some of his deepest feelings out into the open.

A gunman angered by prior police shootings took aim at the cops during a downtown protest. His raw emotions started to take over. He started out to become a lawyer in his early career while being a police officer. But after being assigned to patrol his own neighborhood, he saw he could have a more immediate impact on the city he loved. He has excelled in his patrols and he moved to internal affairs and SWAT. He levelled up each time. His best was when he oversaw the department's crime fighting programs and everyone saw a historic drop in crime rates. But though he has had successes, he also had several pains. His former partner was shot and his own son was shot.

"I'm the kind of person that I probably wouldn't protest or complain," he said. "I get involved and do something about it by becoming part of the solution."

He delivered a surprising message to the people marching against police around the country: send him your resumes. "Get off that protest line and put an application in, and we'll put you in your neighborhood and we will help you resolve some of the problems you're protesting about," he said.

He knows there is much work to do and even though the recent shooting pained him the most. Dallas Police Chief David Brown's career focus aims to do more good for his own community.

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