Mar 28, 2016 09:20 AM EDT

How You Should You Act When You Get Promoted Over Your Friends?

By R S Ali

When you've suddenly been made boss, it means your employees are your former friends: people who you had a friendly, venting relationship with. Monster suggests things you should do to maintain professionalism and make sure you are a successful leader.

First, acknowledge that this is something you have earned, and something you should be happy about. But don't forget the challenges that come with having to change the relationship you once had with people.

Managing and leading people who used to be your friends and former peers are things no one wishes to have to do. Be prepared to face jealousy and envy and even some resistance.

No, you don't have to become a completely different person, or worse, a dictator. You also don't have to change everything overnight, because that will be difficult for your new employees and unsettling for you, too. But you can't have your friend Jane venting to you about the workplace and the terrible management anymore, so what do you do?

This is what you do:

1. Disengage yourself from the casual friendships

Do it gradually. Make excuses at first - you are busy is one that is bound to work. Don't go out for as many lunches. Don't hang around the cooler for office gosspi anymore.

Understand that you are now no longer a part of the inner circle of venters. Accept this, and let me adjust on their own and with each other - but without you. Being too friendly is going to make your job of separating your personal relationships with your employee-employer relationship that much harder.

2. Try to soften the landing

There is no doubt that there is going to be some jealousy. There will probably be people who think they were better for the job. You have to know how to smooth out the creases over time. Do this by being the leader and authority figure you were appointed to be.

Show them you are worthy of the position. Be firm but not unkind. Handle the situation with grace and sincerity and be down to earth but remember that you have the decision making power.

Make sure they know you are there for them, but as their boss: not friend. The distinction is vital. They will respect the open communication.

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